The mall I work in doesn't have free wifi. This is often a problem.
Typically, I can't use my shop's computers during operating hours - people need to buy shit. There isn't a way for a bitch to just jump onto a computer and use it. My shop actually has wifi, which I'm sure would be helpful if I could just pop into our back room and sit down and work for a few hours, but we don't have a back room. Most of the time, if there's something particular that I need to do online during business hours, I have to go hunting in the mall for free wifi so I can get online with my tablet and get my shit done.
Here are my options:
1. Timothy's coffee shop: comfortable seating, quiet environment. The only problem is that there's a two-hour internet limit and there aren't available outlets to charge anything.
2. Starbucks: No internet limit, but it's in the shittiest corner of the mall, rife with hobos and always full of students taking up all the outlets and seating for their phones.
3. The food court in the atrium (the tiny mall attached to my mall): smack in between the Greyhound bus station and the liquor store, this is really a slice of downtown Toronto. Everyone smells like piss, everyone has some sort of mental health issue, people are constantly interrupting you to ask for change and there aren't any outlets. However, the wifi, which comes from the Teriyaki joint, is decent.
4. St Louis Bar and Grill: Ample seating, sometimes you can get next to an outlet, pretty quiet during the day. Alas, this is a restaurant and while I can fuck up a plate of wings, no problem, I can't sit there for eight hours or they get kind of testy.
So there I was one evening, after having bounced around for a couple of hours at three different locations trying to get some work done, left with the McDonald's wifi because that was apparently the only place in my mall where I could get online, sit down and plug in my tablet at an outlet. I had to sit next to these two girls at this long table sort of thing, because when outlets are at a premium, you basically elbow your way in whenever you can. When I sat down, the two girls were in the midst of being hit on by some dude, because downtown Toronto lyfe.
Let me make this clear - these two ladies had their shields up hardcore. They were trying everything in the book to get this dude to go away, but subtlety never works with guys who try to pick up women at fucking McDonald's. I, of course, listened to every single word because I pay a lot of attention to my sisters and the men who bother them. Just in case reinforcement is necessary. And also, because repelling lecherous men is my main thrill in life.
Dude: So are y'all from Scarborough?
Girl no. 1: Nope. We're having a sisters day. Just spending some time together. By ourselves.
Dude: Cool, cool. I don't want to bother you -
Girl no. 1: I appreciate that, thanks.
Dude: I'm just gonna give you my number.
Girl no. 1: That's okay.
Dude: Yeah, you can just text me. Just text me.
Girl no. 1: Sigh.
So the guy gives her his number, and out of the corner of my eye, I watch the girl pretend to tap around on her home screen like she's putting it in there. He scuttles off, pretty pleased with himself BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK WITH THESE GUYS JESUS and the girls go back to their own conversation.
About three seconds later, these other two guys sit down across from them. They start hassling the girls immediately because two women can't possibly sit down in public and enjoy each other's company or eat some fucking fries on their own. After maybe three more seconds of witty banter, one of the guys is all, "Can I have yo number?" and Girl no. 1 GOES OFF:
Girl no. 1: YOU THINK YOU JUST GONNA SIT DOWN AND GET MY NUMBER JUST LIKE THAT? YOU THINK THAT'S ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS SIT DOWN??
I stopped listening after that. These ladies had everything under control.
No comments:
Post a Comment